The Most Effective Way to Change Minds is to Eat Your Own Dog Food
How leading change starts with changing yourself
Today’s Tidbit is a practice in what we in the business world call, “Eating your own dog food.” This idea stemmed from a dog food creator that believed so much in the dog food he created, he fed it to his own dog. It’s a lesson on leading change by living change first, understanding people’s needs, and connecting the two.
“How do I get my team on board with Kanban?” Over the last few weeks I have heard this question multiple times and in various forms. And I get it. Anytime I hear some new concept that makes a ton of sense, I instinctively want to share that news and see light bulbs go off in other people’s eyes. But what happens when all I get is skepticism and resistance? That sounds like a great topic for our Tuesday Tidbit.
Hungry Learners: A Cautionary Tale
I’ve had the pleasure of training and mentoring dozens of people over the last three years. In that time, I have gotten that question of, “How do I get my team, leader, or insert other resistant force, to jump on board and start doing this?” It’s the classic case of unstoppable force meets immovable object. I love the passion and enthusiasm these well meaning students have. After all, they have come across something that makes so much sense they almost can’t fathom why others would not immediately see the value. Often what they experience is immediate resistance or, worse, direct push back. I personally enjoy the pushback, but for people trying to elevate their teams and leaders out of the mire of broken workflows and processes, it can feel like defeat. For some, it can even make them question the validity of the training.
What’s the solution?
Why People Resist
Before I give you my take it makes sense to try and understand where those people are coming from. In my experience, the first issue is change fatigue. Imagine for a moment that other people just as enthusiastic as you have already tried to “shoot all the sacred cows” and all they did was leave a bloody trail of unstructured changes. I’ve seen this fatigue in someone’s eyes and heard it in their voice when they told me, “Tristan, we’ve been here before. Every five years a new leader or C-Person comes in, orders a bunch of change, and then moves on. Behind them is a trail of broken and battered people left to clean up the mess.” At first I just thought this was a different form of resistance, but then I experienced it myself.
Times of Stress Reveal Beliefs
When the “crap hits the fan” we see what people genuinely believe. James Clear puts it this way:
In times of stress, we fall to the level of our systems.
I was once told by a leader that we, “Had to get a team transformed.” They had to adopt the practices we were teaching, and they had to do it quick. The team was open, for sure. They started to try, clumsily, to adopt the change and, for a while, it made them look like a new team. Things like a focus on team health, visualizing work, and collaboration. It was music to my ears.
That’s when the first big issue came up.
There was a last minute pivot by a leader. The very first thing the team was asked to do was the exact opposite of what they had just adopted. The leader said, “All that stuff is too slow. We have to get this work shipped.” The team immediately fell back into old patterns and had absolutely no desire to go through the work of changing. So the next time I brought up some bad behavior at a stand-up I had someone tell me, “That sounds great Tristan, until the next pivot from a leader. It’s better for us to just continue working one way since as soon as something important comes up all that other stuff goes out the window.”
There is another explanation I’ve heard from a friend and fellow coach, Jon Beebe:
During a crisis is not time to try new things. You kind of have to lean on what you’ve learned before you got there.
My experience, plus the words from James and Jon, helped to finally unlock the answer for how you effectively change people’s minds.
You can’t.
“But Tristan, you said there was an answer!” There is, but you won’t like it.
Make it Real, Solve THEIR Problem
As I stated in the title you have to change your own mind first. It’s the advice I give to every student that asks the question, “How do I get people to do this if I don’t have influence?” It has to be something you believe and, as is the case with true belief, do on a regular basis. Actions speak louder than words.
The only times I have driven effective change was when people saw not just the passion I had for an idea but, most importantly, the way in which it had worked in my life. I don’t just tell people to visualize their work; I visualize my work. I don’t just tell people to build a relationship with God; I build relationship with God. I don’t just tell people to love their wife and kids; I love my wife and kids. There is a reason the fruit of a person speaks more than their words. We live in a “show me” world. People are skeptical and want to see the results you’ve gotten and get when the proverbial chips are down and times are hard. They want to see that you “put your money where your mouth is.” As a people, as a race, we are looking for what’s real.
Even more than that, they want to solve THEIR immediate problems. If a team’s biggest issue is they aren’t clear what work is currently being executed, teaching them anything other than visualizing work is a waste of time.
The best way to help people change is, instead of pushing your ideas on them, find out where they are hurting and show them how your principles alleviated that pain. The rest are anecdotes that are about as helpful as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum.
That’s it. That’s the answer. When someone asks, “How do I get my team to adopt this new principle or practice,” the answer is, “Do it yourself, find their pain points, and then connect how that principle or practice helped you.”
Until next time,
Keep on learning. Keep on growing.